The Midlife Gap Year

Guest Post by Mid Life Opportunity member James Cave
There used to be this really strong feeling that gap years were only for school leavers and youngsters, luckily for us, this feeling is on the way out. Our culture is changing, and that means all of us travel-hungry folks who are well past our twenties don't have to just sit back all dewy eyed thinking about all the opportunities we missed out on, we can go and make some new ones for ourselves.

I think the biggest road block people faced when they thought about travelling as an older person is the idea that it might have some lasting ramifications on their career. And don't get me wrong, this is a really valid concern, but there's a definite change in perception these days.

The times when we chose a career in our teens and stuck with it right through until retirement are long gone, now we're expected to move around and hop from company to company every few years. In fact, our culture has now changed so much, that changing job or moving organisation is often seen as the only way to gain a promotion or pay rise for a lot of sectors.

What does this mean for adults hoping for a gap year? That the gap on your CV isn't going to be looked at in the kind of negative light you've been worried about. In fact, employers may even look at it as a positive. As the popularity for gap years has grown, so has an opinion that by going on one, people are not only broadening their horizons, but showing a willingness to learn and a flexibility that’s really very desirable in the working world.

On the other hand, if you’d love to go travelling but are actually happy in the job you’re in just now, sit down and have a chat with your boss or HR department. You could find they already have a set of rules for circumstances like that, and many businesses will offer an unpaid sabbatical, often for something more like three to six months, but occasionally for a whole year. This makes sense for a business that values their employees, as not only does it mean they are likely to come back more enthusiastic and with new skills, but there’s evidence that finding replacements for skilled workers isn’t cheap.

Another thing to think about is the fact that your gap year could leave you with some real, long-lasting benefits if you decide to learn a language or take part in some overseas learning while you’re away. Whether you choose to travel to France to learn French, or fly to French-speaking Canada (Quebec) to do the same, or even just decide to spend a few months in Australia, working in a bar, you’ll be adding new experiences and skills to your portfolio, something you should never put off doing.

Midlife Success

We tend to think that it is the strongest that survive. The strongest boxers win their fights. The strongest athletes win their events. Those with the strongest intellects win the argument.

Whilst this is undeniably true, Charles Darwin recognised that whilst the strongest might survive (and thrive) in the short term, there is no guarantee that this will last.

Darwin identified that “It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change”.

Responsiveness and adaptability are the keys to success in the longer term. So we can all succeed, even if we aren’t the strongest or the most intelligent.

• Having the best plan is not enough – how that plan is executed is the key to success.
• Having the strongest relationship with your partner isn’t enough – those in successful relationships work at it and adapt as they go along.
• Being the brightest and most intelligent is not enough – those who understand the insight and exhibit high levels of emotional intelligence are the most successful, in any walk of life.

So there’s hope for us all!

Those of us in midlife are particularly well placed in this regard. We have amassed a mountain of experience in a number of areas during our lifetime and we (more or less) understand the implications of our decisions. We have transferable skills – yes, you have transferable skills, list them!

These can be used to our advantage in every situation. Promotion at work, finding a new job, starting a new relationship, moving to a new area – it’s all down to your adaptability. Whether you succeed or fail is down to you.

Remember ‘No-one’s coming’. It’s down to you and you alone (with advice and guidance from as many sources as you can find).

Now here's the punchline....

How adaptable are you?

Relationship and Career Advice for over 45s

In midlife, many of us are settled into a routine. We have the same job that we’ve had for years, we live with the same partner, we buy the same brands at the supermarket every week, We’re probably quite conservative when it comes to change. This may be absolutely right for many people. It could be completely wrong for others.

If you aren’t happy in your job, why do you stay? Why are you wasting so many hours of your life?  Steve Preston, one of the career coaches on The Mid Life Opportunity Coaching Panel, calls this the Velvet Rut.

If you’re relationship is rocky, why do you stay together? Think who might be out there waiting for you!
The answer to these questions depends on your attitude to Risk and your fear of Failure.

To illustrate this, how do you feel about jumping over a 4 foot ditch? Easy? Take a run up, take off, land on the other side with both feet on the ground. No problem. Now let's try the same exercise, jumping across a 4 foot gap, but this time you are standing on top of a tower block, jumping from one block to the next. There's a 100 foot drop to the ground.  Not so easy now? It's the same distance, the same effort. You know that you can do it because you've jumped across the ditch. But you don't feel quite so confident now do you?
Why is this? The difference, of course, is the fear of failure. If you fail to jump across the ditch, you might get a wet foot. No big deal. If you fail to jump across the gap between the tower blocks you will fall to your death.

If you have a low fear of failure and you are willing to take a risk, you will attempt the high level jump and almost certainly succeed.

If you fear failure and are less willing to take risks you will not attempt the high level jump, but you are very likely to jump the low level ditch – and succeed without getting your feet wet.

Most people who remain unfulfilled in life – those who remain in jobs they detest or who continue in relationships which have all but collapsed – have a high fear of failure. They’d rather carry on with ‘the devil they know’ than strike out and try something new.

People in midlife who are made redundant or who find themselves at the wrong end of a relationship breakdown don’t have the luxury of making the choice between the status quo or starting something new. They have to start again, regardless of their attitude to risk. And do you know what? Many of them succeed in the new direction that they choose. Many midlifers find that they can take a risk and succeed. They can change direction and make a new life for themselves.

What is your attitude to risk? Would you try the high level jump or are you strictly a ditch jumper?

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Rob Horlock has established The Mid Life Opportunity (www.midlifeop.com), a community for people in Midlife. Advice and Guidance is available from The Mid Life Coaching Panel. It’s free to join - click here

The Ospreys of The Loch of Lowes

Readers of this blog may remember that, last year, I posted about 'Lady', the 26 year old osprey who almost died, then miraculously recovered to raise her chicks and migrate off to Africa for the winter. There was some doubt as to whether she would survive to return to Scotland for another breeding season. But survive she has and she returned to her nest on the loch side a few days ago.


Would her mate, 7Y, return or would he fall prey to one of the hazards of the natural world (or a human hazard)?

There was great emotion, both among the rangers and Lady, when 7Y appeared this morning! The ospreys immediately recognised each other and paired up again for the summer. If Lady successfully rears her chicks this year she will have raised at least 50 chicks during her lifetime, a fantastic achievement for a species that, 20 years ago, was a rare sight in Britain.


A fabulous story which you can follow here:


Osprey blog:
http://blogs.swt.org.uk/osprey/


Webcam:
http://www.swt.org.uk/wildlife/webcams/loch-of-lowes/


If you can afford a small donation to help the scheme to ring the osprey chicks and follow their migration to Africa in the autumn, your gift would be warmly received.

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Rob Horlock has established The Mid Life Opportunity (www.midlifeop.com), a community for people in Midlife. Advice and Guidance is available from The Mid Life Coaching Panel. It’s free to join - click here

The Midlife Survey Results

The Mid Life Survey has been running for a year now so here are the headline annual results. Where comparisons are given, these relate to the previous results in June 2010.

Survey Respondents’ Profile:

Male: 38%,  Female: 62%

Age: 30-40: 11%, 40-50: 39%, 50-60 39%, other: 11%

Location: UK 44%, USA 39%, Europe 7%, Canada 3%, Australia 3%, Other 4%

Q1 - Happiness with Life:

46% of respondents were either happy or very happy with their lives at the moment, down from 55% previously. A further 32% were ‘OK.’ The remainder were either unhappy or very unhappy

Q2 - How is your Relationship?

26% of respondents said that they were happy and 27% said that they were in love (down from 32%). Perhaps more worryingly, 15% said that ‘they don’t do relationships’. 23% were just ‘OK’.

Comments in this section included:

'I am going to therapy to learn how to be less dependent on my wife to feel happy.'

'It's complicated!'

'Going thru financial hardships has made a huge impact on our marriage. Ever since we had our daughter almost 10 years ago, we have just been gonig thru the motions rather than being an affectionate married couple.'

‘31 years of marriage both now have a PHD in marriage’

‘I feel fortunate to have a partnership that works. Not that there are not disagreements, there are. We just know how to solve them.’

Q3 – Will your Pension provide for you?

A worryingly high 23% of respondents don’t have a pension (down from 26%), while 26% felt that their pension would cover their needs in later life (up from 22%). 27% regretted not saving more during their earlier years. 21% had other investments, either instead of, or as well as, a pension.

Comment in this section included:

‘We are never retiring but hope to get refired!’ (love it!)

‘I'm hopeful that my financial situation will change. However, I know it is up to me to make it change’

‘I am still saving and investing’

'I'll get by. But I'm not sure how my wife and I both will deal with having to down size.'

'You must be kidding!'

'I got half of our retirement savings, but the stock market ate half of that. We'd planned to do most of our savings as his career took full swing. The problem is that it took full swing and then we divorced.'

‘I am working on passive income and believe it will cover expenses plus more.’

Q4- How Healthy are you?

42% said that they were OK for their age and 26% felt they were Pretty Fit. 23% were overweight, to some extent. 2% said that they could ‘Run a Marathon’.

One respondent had a problem this question, as they felt that someone who is overweight could still run a marathon. I completely accept that this is quite true and I wasn’t trying to mislead when I wrote the questions.

Q5-Is your life better or worse than your parents lives?

This question caused confusion for several people and when I rerun the survey I will reword it. Some respondents felt that there should be a distinction between the financial side of their lives and the emotional/satisfaction side of things.

Overall 86% felt that their lives were better than their parents’ lives.

Comments in this section included:

‘There should be "about the same" choice here. My parents had a nice life, and mine is nice too. Not really better or worse. I did not have children, and they raised myself and my siblings - so their young life might have been worse than mine.’

‘My dad made enough for my mom to stay home w/the 2 kids, but they went without a lot of stuff. Both my husband and I work (I'm in my own business, coming up on year 2) so the money's not always there, and that adds a lot of stress to him.’

‘My dad was a happy person and my mother was very unhappy. It was a big division they could never figure out.’

‘Much more emotionally healthy but not better financially yet.’

'this is a little too absolute. It's different - better in some contexts, worse in others.'

'I think I'm happier, but they are wealthier'

'Unemployed at 57'

'My parents had the perfect marriage. My father died a few years ago (at 59 way too young), so trying to live up to that type of happiness has also been a strain (this is ME comparing our marriage to theirs, not my husband comparing)'

Q6- How do you feel about your Life in General?

57% are looking forward to the rest of their lives (down from 63%) and 27% feel that ‘the best is yet to come’ (many of these will be the same people). 16% wish they’d studied harder when they were young (up from 7%) and 26% are worried about the rest of their lives (up from 18%). A strong theme was a worry about the world that their children will live in with 20% indicating this.

Comments in this section included:

‘I can't keep worrying about "what had happened", because it's in the past - so it can't be changed. It can be learned from, however, so hopefully I'll continue to grow as I ripen with age. I do worry about the world my kids are inheriting, but hopefully we'll give them the tools they'll need to make a difference :)’

‘I am concerned about the problems my kids and grand kids run up against, but I am not worried. I actively work to make it better.’

'The best is really right now and it's all been so good--this said with my advanced transformation hat on--and what's to come will be juicy and delicious, no modifiers need apply.'

'I am looking forward for the rest of my life, but I am worried that my wife and I may not be happy together. We've been married 24 years and have 1 daughter in college. We've been through a lot together, Good and Bad, but I'm not sure how we can fall back in love. That is important to me, but I don't think it is with her.'

Conclusions:

So what do we conclude from this survey? Overall, there was a broad spectrum of responses with the majority of midlifers feeling that their lives are going 'OK to Well', although this has declined since last June, when the previous survey results were published. A worrying number continue to feel that their financial provision could be better. Given the state of the world economy, that’s not a huge surprise.

Relationships are a very mixed bag, probably reflecting the fact that many midlifers will have ended a long term relationship (either willingly or unwillingly). I was surprised to see that almost a fifth of respondents ‘don’t do relationships’. It would be interesting to probe deeper into those responses.

It’s encouraging that the majority of midlifers are looking forward to the rest of their lives. Equally encouraging is the concern over the world that our children and grandchildren will live in and the hope is that some of us will actively try to make this better.

I will shortly be setting up the new Mid Life Survey so if you have any questions that you would like me to include, please let me know.

Rob Horlock

The Mid Life Opportunity www.MidLifeOp.com

Now here is this week's 'sexist' joke:

A husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart. 

The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart. 

'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife. 

'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans he replies. 

'Put them back, we can't afford them demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping. 

A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and puts it in the basket. 

What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband. 

'It’s my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' replies the wife. 

Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it's half the price.'

He never knew what hit him....

Midlife Humour - The Stella Awards

It's time again for the annual 'Stella Awards'! For those  unfamiliar with these awards, they are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued the McDonald's in New Mexico , where she purchased coffee. You remember, she took the lid off the coffee and put it between her knees while she was driving. Who would ever think one could get burned doing that, right? That' s right; these are awards for the most outlandish lawsuits and verdicts in the U.S. You know, the kinds of cases that make you scratch your head. So keep your head scratcher handy.

Here are the Stellas for the past year:

* SEVENTH PLACE *

Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas was awarded $80,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The store owners were understandably surprised by the verdict, considering the running toddler was her own son.

Start scratching!

* SIXTH PLACE *

Carl Truman, 19, of Los Angeles , California won $74,000 plus medical expenses when his neighbour ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbour's hubcaps.

Scratch some more...

* FIFTH PLACE *

Terrence Dickson, of Bristol , Pennsylvania was leaving a house he had just burgled by way of the garage. Unfortunately for Dickson, the automatic garage door opener malfunctioned and he could not get the garage door to open.
Worse, he couldn't re-enter the house because the door connecting the garage to the house locked when Dickson pulled it shut. Forced to sit for eight, count 'em, EIGHT days and survive on a case of Pepsi and a large bag of dry dog food, he sued the homeowner's insurance company claiming undue mental Anguish.
Amazingly, the jury said the insurance company must pay Dickson $500,000 for his anguish. We should all have this kind of anguish. Keep scratching. There are more....

Double hand scratching after this one..

* FOURTH PLACE *

Jerry Williams, of Little Rock, Arkansas, garnered 4th Place in the Stella's when he was awarded $14,500 plus medical expenses after being bitten on the butt by his next door neighbor's beagle - even though the beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. Williams did not get as much as he asked for because the jury believed the beagle might have been provoked at the time of the butt bite because Williams had climbed over the fence into the yard and repeatedly shot the dog with a pellet gun.

Pick a new spot to scratch, you're getting a bald spot..

* THIRD PLACE *

Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania because a jury ordered a Philadelphia restaurant to pay her $113,500 after she slipped on a spilled soft drink and broke her tailbone. The reason the soft drink was on the floor: Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument. Whatever happened to people being responsible for their own actions?

Only two more so ease up on the scratching....

* SECOND PLACE *

Kara Walton, of Claymont , Delaware sued the owner of a night club in a nearby city because she fell from the bathroom window to the floor, knocking out her two front teeth. Even though Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the ladies room window to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge, the jury said the night club had to pay her $12,000.....oh, yeah, plus dental expenses. Go figure.  

Ok. Here we go!!

* FIRST PLACE *

This year's runaway First Place Stella Award winner was:  Mrs. Merv Grazinski, of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, who purchased a new 32-foot Winnebago motor home.

On her first trip home, from an OU football game, having driven on to the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the driver's seat to go to the back of the Winnebago to make herself a sandwich.

Not surprisingly, the motor home left the freeway, crashed and overturned.

Also not surprisingly, Mrs. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not putting in the owner's manual that she couldn't actually leave the driver's seat while the cruise control was set. The Oklahoma jury awarded her, are you sitting down? $1,750,000 PLUS a new motor home. Winnebago actually changed their manuals as a result of this suit, just in case Mrs. Grazinski has any relatives who might also buy a motor home.

Are we, as a society, getting more stupid.....
or are more members of Congress serving on juries these days?

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Rob Horlock has established The Mid Life Opportunity (www.midlifeop.com), a community for people in Midlife. Advice and Guidance is available from The Mid Life Coaching Panel. It’s free to join - click here

Article Marketing on Steroids

This post is slightly different from my usual posts. I’ve recently come across a great way to multiply the number of links to my site and I thought I’d share it with you. If you are into article marketing, this is for you.


Spin Distribute has created a unique article distribution system. It takes your article, creates 1000s of unique versions of it, and sends these unique articles to 1000s of relevant websites. This way you get 1000s of links from relevant websites, and Google loves you.


I have started using this and it really does work. My Google ranking has definitely improved.


You’ll find the details here: Spin Distribute


Aaron Suster, the founder of Spin Distribute is about to launch a new product called SmileySEO. It is a set of tools to help you to manage your website (and keep an eye on your competitors):

• If there is something wrong with your website, the system will immediately send you an email about it. 
• If you exchange links with someone, the system will monitor your partner to make sure the links to your website are still published. 
• You can track your position in search engines.
• You can create an analysis of your own website, or your competitor’s website. 
• You can find the best keywords to expand your business.

Details of SmilySEO are here: Smiley SEO

Yes, these are affiliate links. Regular readers will know that I rarely promote products and when I do, they are products that I know will work.


Try them and see for yourself!

How to Reignite the Spark in Midlife Relationships

Guest post by Devon Solinger Berger, CPC, ELI-MP


Midlife is often a period of time where people experience major transitions. It is perfectly normal even when it seems outrageous. If you can remember just that one statement, you are already headed down the track to peace and tranquility. The good news is that by the time you reach midlife, you have lived enough to have acquired some valuable knowledge. The key is how you utilize this knowledge to help you to not only survive, but thrive in this chapter of life.

One of the biggest relationship transitions that most people are not aware of involves the possibility that both yours and your partner’s essential human needs have shifted.  There are several human needs we all have and if all of them are being met, we are experiencing blissful fulfillment. If only some of them are being met, we are happy and content. However, if none of them are being met within the relationship, it is human nature to seek to have them met elsewhere. 

This is the list most widely accepted by relationship experts: 
- to feel loved or bonded with another person, 
- to feel important or valued, 
- security and comfort, 
- spontaneity or variety, 
- to grow and develop, 
- to make a contribution to others.

If you take a look at the list, you might begin to identify with a couple of these more than the others. If you take an even closer look at your life, you might even see how the importance of these has shifted. When you first got together with your partner, your needs may have been completely different and the reason the relationship seemed to work so well was that you were able to meet each other needs-- sometimes without even realizing it!

People’s needs change over time and we sometimes are not aware of this fact. Since we aren’t aware of it, we certainly can’t clue our partners in on the change either. 
Unconsciously, you both began seeking to have your new needs met in other ways, because your partner was not satisfying them for you.

For example, when women become mothers they can often have their need for love and bonding met in the relationship with their children. One possible consequence of this is that her partner feels excluded and unloved. To compensate, he seeks to have that need met by spending more time at work or with friends and avoids the home.

Sound familiar?  Have no fear!  The awareness alone empowers you to make a change and to save your relationship!

First, figure out what your most important needs are and how they are currently being met or not met. Then, share openly with your partner. Figure out what his or her needs are and make an effort to fulfill those needs within your relationship. This might sound a little unfair to you, but remember that it is incredibly effective AND it is the key to taking your relationship to the next level of everlasting and blissful love!


Devon Solinger Berger, CPC, ELI-MP    Art of Relationship Life Coaching
973.615.4077

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Rob Horlock has established The Mid Life Opportunity (www.midlifeop.com), a community for people in Midlife. Advice and Guidance is available from The Mid Life Coaching Panel. It’s free to join - click here

If you always do what you've always done...

We all know the saying 'If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got' (or words to that effect). But in today's harsh economic climate, is this still true? If we always do what we've always done, the chances are that we won't get what we've always got, we'll get less! Why? Because our competitors are trying harder. The goalposts have moved and if we don't do things differently, we'll actually be moving backwards, relative to others.

The reward for the same effort will be smaller. Make sense?

So what to do? The obvious answer is to work harder at what we do. The less obvious answer is to work smarter at what we do. Here are five ways to work smarter:

1. Set yourself ONE goal.
Yes, you want to have several goals, and that's fine, but set one primary goal. A goal that you really MUST achieve. This can be a long term goal, a medium term goal or a short term goal. If it's a substantial goal, break it down into smaller goals, with timelines, so that you can see how you are progressing towards your primary goal. Have other goals by all means, but don't lose sight of the primary goal.

2. Get organised
We all know this, but how organised are you? How many of the tasks that you do are duplicated? How often do you mislay documents (printed or electronic?) and spend too much time looking for them - or worse still, rewriting them?
Organise your filing systems, especially your electronic files. Give each of your electronic files a sensible name and the date that you saved it. Don't call it 'Jane's file', call it 'Jane's workplan - 12/2/2011' That way, you've got a fighting chance of finding it again. If you share files with other people, a sensible filename will save you both time.
Clear your desk and work with the papers that you need at that time. Don't surround yourself with papers and post it notes that will distract you from the task in hand.

3. Delegate
What tasks can you delegate to others? Do you have a virtual assistant? Concentrate on doing the things that you're good at and delegate other specialist tasks to others who can do them quicker, more efficiently and more effectively. Can't afford to do that? What about trading work - you help me and I'll help you. This doesn't work in all situations but you'll be surprised how often it can work - ask the question!

4. Plan your work
This is something else that we all know we should be doing but how many of us really plan our days, our weeks and our months? How many objectives do we set ourselves? Don't go overboard and plan everything down to the finest detail (especially your leisure time) but do give yourself a chance by thinking about what you need to do and writing a plan, however brief. If you don't know where you're going, you'll never know when you get there.

5. Do one thing at a time
This follows on from point 2 above. It's very easy to get distracted - Facebook and Twitter can eat time if you let them (and you do, don't you?!)
If you have a portfolio career, or you work on several projects simultaneously, it is very easy to get distracted. The phone may ring and someone needs to ask you a question about a project which you're not working on at the time. Answer the question, then get back to the project which you were working on without  meandering off and wondering why the person asked you the question.

Do the IMPORTANT tasks before the easy ones (and the ones you like doing). Don't put things off! So don't always do what you've always done - do something smarter!

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Rob Horlock has established The Mid Life Opportunity (www.midlifeop.com), a community for people in Midlife. Advice and Guidance is available from The Mid Life Coaching Panel. It’s free to join - click here

Freedom of Expression

Freedom of expression is one of the basics of a democratic society. Today, more than ever before, the individual is able to express their views and opinions and broadcast their thoughts to a global audience. Social media enables all of us to air our views and ping them off to anyone and everyone who has an interest. So far, so good.

Moving the argument along a little, if we have this new found freedom to broadcast to the world, we also have a responsibility to think about what we are saying and doing. Whilst some extreme views or actions can be discounted, others may have far reaching consequences which we had never imagined.

A campaign on Twitter against an organisation or an individual may make us feel better, but what are the longer term consequences?

We might agree that Wikileaks has the moral right to broadcast secret government documents because the government shouldn’t be acting in such a covert manner. Really? Do the guys at Wilikeaks really understand what they are doing? Clearly they don’t. Being motivated by a need to expose people/governments may seem altruistic and desirable but they have completely overlooked The Law of Unintended Consequences (LUC).

In any society we have to have some order. We have to have people who lead and people who are led. We may not like or respect our leaders and we may wish to demonstrate against them but there has to be a limit to this.

Social media has allowed the individual to cross this line and the dangers are clearly visible. When launching a campaign or exposé we must ask WHY we are doing this. We must also ask ourselves WHAT we expect to happen as a result and we must never forget LUC.

We must take responsibility for our actions and understand the consequences. The alternative is anarchy and throughout history, anarchy has always ended in disaster …

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Rob Horlock has established The Mid Life Opportunity (www.midlifeop.com), a community for people in Midlife. Advice and Guidance is available from The Mid Life Coaching Panel. It’s free to join - click here

The Mid Life Guide

Are you interested in contributing to The Mid Life Opportunity and developing an ongoing passive income source for yourself? Yes? No?

Do you have a specific interest, skill or expertise in a particular area that would be of interest to people in midlife? Can you write 5,000 - 10,000 words of rich, insightful copy?

We are developing The Mid Life Guide, with a number of sections which will be contributed by experts in their own areas. These areas include:

• Living your Second Half
• Fitness without Pain
• Healthy Eating
• Relationships
• Finding a new Job
• Starting on Online Business
• Starting an Affiliate Business
• Looking towards Retirement
• Being Positive
• Overcoming Adversity
• Your Health in Midlife
• Money Making Opportunities for Midlifers
• Others?

Several of the sections of the Guide are already taken and we can't accept competing copy. We are also happy to hear from you if you have something which you think will fit in with The Mid Life Guide but which isn't in the original list of sections. We're open to your suggestions :)

If you would like to contribute, please let us know by commenting below. Together, we can change the world - well, the midlife world ...

www.MidLifeOp.com

Midlife Careers

The number if people without jobs in the UK fell last month. This surprised pretty much everyone in the media and the city. The value of Sterling rose, as a result.

Every day we read and hear doom and gloom in the media – public sector jobs disappearing, the private sector can’t create enough jobs to make up the difference, the West is in decline, etc , etc.
This may all be true – the point is, though, that the media don’t seem to be getting the reality of the new economy. Jobs for life have gone. Generous pensions are a thing of the past. Retiring early is not an option for most of us. But the same ‘most of us’ are still surviving; many of us are doing very well. Virtually all of the doom and gloom mongers in the media are, themselves, doing very well. Plenty of companies are reporting increased profits (though, of course, there are plenty more companies who are struggling).

The negativity in the media is relentless, but totally overblown. How many people do you know who are really struggling to keep their heads above water? They might have cut back through fears of redundancy, they might be earning a bit less than they were but how many are really struggling?

The world of work is changing. More and more people have ‘portfolio careers’ – more than one part time job. Many midlifers, in particular, are following this career path, sometimes by necessity rather than design. Many of these are doing very well for themselves. They have more flexibility and can choose to work for 7 days in the week or take some time off.

These roles may be office based or home based. Increasingly they will involve the internet in some form. The www has provided unimaginable opportunities for people to build their own business and midlifers in particular have an opportunity to start the next phase of their careers building an online business.
This is the future, I have no doubt.

We all need to take more control over our own lives. Midlifers, with their mix of life experiences, wisdom and adaptability are uniquely placed to cash in on their past and start an interest based business to safeguard their future. To find out more - Mid Life Career

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Rob Horlock has established The Mid Life Opportunity (www.midlifeop.com), a community for people in Midlife. Advice and Guidance is available from The Mid Life Coaching Panel. It’s free to join - click here

10 Reasons Why We Underachieve in Midlife

Are you in Midlife – over 35 maybe (perhaps well over 35) with lots left to offer to the world? You’re keen to make your mark and leave something behind for future generations?

Many people in midlife genuinely want to do something great but most don’t manage to do it. Why is that? What holds them back?

 

Here are 10 reasons why midlifers might underachieve (feel free to add more below):

• Fear of failure 
• Lack of money 
• Not wanting to step outside of their comfort zone 
• Concern about feeling foolish 
• Not sure about their idea 
• Underestimating their own abilities 
• Don’t know where to start 
• Don’t know where to go for help 
• Fear of starting but not finishing 
• Not having enough time

Each of these reasons is a perfectly valid reason for our midlifer to stay where they are and carry on with their usual routine. They may be perfectly happy, but they will get to the end of their lives and wonder ‘what if?’

 

As Henry Ford said, ‘If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.’ (my favourite saying)

 

So what's holding you back? Write down your list of reasons why you are not making your mark. Start with the list above and add/subtract your own reasons until you have your own list.

 

Take each one ask WHY this is a problem. Write down the answer(s). Then ask WHY again to get more detail. Continue doing this until you really understand the reason for your underachievement. Repeat this for each of your reasons.

 

Once you have done this, you will be in a much better position to understand your motivations and have some concrete data to work with to plot your course for a more successful future. Try it, what have you got to lose?

 

You've got it in you, I'm sure!

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Rob Horlock has established The Mid Life Opportunity (www.midlifeop.com), a community for people in Midlife. Advice and Guidance is available from The Mid Life Coaching Panel. It’s free to join - click here

The Mid Life Campaign

As we move through the 21st century we all expect to live longer, more fulfilled lives. Longer life expectation causes problems for the government and the pensions industry and we are now required to work for more years before we qualify for a pension. The ‘statutory retirement age’ is being phased out and ‘retire when you want to’ is being phased in.

This may be welcomed by those who are in rewarding jobs and who don’t fell ready to leave. Those who don’t have a job and whose pension entitlement has been deferred for several years may feel differently.
It is one thing to remain in a job past 60 or 65 if you’ve been employed by the organisation for a number of years. But what if you were made redundant in your late 40s or early 50s and find that job openings for you are negligible to non-existent? How will you manage until you reach the new retirement age (or even the old one?)
Many Midlifers find themselves in this position, through no fault of their own. They are ‘over qualified’ (too old) for most jobs that they apply for even if they are willing to take a large cut in their salary expectations.

The government (all governments) seem unable or unwilling to recognise that Midlifers who aren’t employed in their 50s face a severe uphill struggle to gain meaningful employment for the remainder of their working lives. Maybe the government is just naïve and doesn’t believe that the ‘over qualified’ (too old) response from recruiters and employers is the reality of life. Why should they; they are so far removed from the coal face that they believe their own rhetoric.

People in midlife have little support. People of pensionable age have a whole raft of support. Young people, too, have a host of government initiatives aimed at helping them to find worthwhile work (these initiatives may or may not be succeeding but at least they focus on the issue). Midlifers have little or no support to find a new role for themselves. They fall down between the cracks in the floorboards of life and many are unable to find a way out.

Vast amounts of experience are being wasted as talented midlifers struggle to find an outlet for their expertise. They can’t fallback on ‘early retirement’ in most cases as their pension pots aren’t sufficient to cover their needs. Neither do they want to retire prematurely – most midlifers want to carry on in the world of work, earning their living and putting their experience to good use.

There is a ticking time bomb here that is largely unrecognised.

So what’s to be done?
The government must recognise this issue and understand the implications of their changes in working policies. The Mid Life Opportunity will shortly be launching a campaign to raise the profile of midlifers. If you would like to be part of this, please join The Mid Life Opportunity mailing list and make your voice heard! Join here: The Mid Life Opportunity
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Rob Horlock has established The Mid Life Opportunity (www.midlifeop.com), a community for people in Midlife. Advice and Guidance is available from The Mid Life Coaching Panel. It’s free to join - click here

Mamils

Yesterday I met a very nice man called James who told me that he was a Mamil.

‘A Mamil?’ I said.

‘Yes,’ replied James, ‘I’ve become a Mamil – a Middle Aged Man in Lycra!’

James is a very keen cyclist, spending his weekends out in the country, lycra clad, cycling around the highways and byways, thinking nothing of riding 30 miles or more. Apparently, this is a growing trend.

Research by Mintel shows that there has been a surge in the number of middle aged men like James who are forsaking their ‘midlife crisis’ sports cars, designer jeans and younger women and buying a bicycle instead. According to Mintel, the past few years have seen the rise of the ultra techno, full carbon fibre, sexy looking road bike. The market for these bikes is expanding rapidly, helped in no small part by the Beijing Olympics and some smart marketing. And Mamils are leading the way.

It’s a very healthy option, I’m sure. Not an inexpensive one, though. James has spent nearly £4,000 on his bicycle and accessories - his new lycra wardrobe, cycling helmet, gloves etc have set him back another few hundred pounds. He loves the look and loves the freedom of the open air and mixing with other Mamils.

As a spokesperson for people in midlife, will I be joining James? Er, probably not. I think I’ll stick to riding my mountain bike to the pub occasionally, on sunny days and leave the lycra to the Mamils!

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Rob Horlock has established The Mid Life Opportunity (www.midlifeop.com), a community for people in Midlife. Advice and Guidance is available from The Mid Life Coaching Panel. It’s free to join - click here