Searching for what you really want

There was a very, very tall coconut tree and four animals:

a Lion

a Chimpanzee

a Giraffe

a Squirrel 

They decide to compete to see who is the fastest to get a banana off of the tree.

Who do you think won?

Your answer will reflect your personality.

So think carefully.  Try and answer within 30 seconds.

Got your answer?

Now scroll down to see the analysis.

If your answer is:

Lion = you're wrong
Chimpanzee = you're wrong.
Giraffe = you're wrong.
Squirrel  = you're wrong.

Because, of course, a coconut tree doesn’t grow bananas!

This is a great example of us seeing what we expect to see, or anticipating an outcome which we expect, but which was never going to happen.

In the UK, it’s often said that the High Street in every town now looks the same – same shops, same signs, same people in many cases. This is true but not if you look up. Look at the architecture of the buildings, look at the rooflines. There are some wonderful old buildings around in our High Streets and we never take the time to notice.

Or we look where we usually look. We look where we expect to find the answer.  When you’re working, how often do you look for the unexpected? How often do you walk a different path? If you work for a large organisation, or have done in the past, I bet you park in the same parking spot every day! 

So take a lesson from the Coconut tree and don’t try to find bananas growing on it. Don’t assume that you’re going to see or hear something before it happens. 

Don’t anticipate a negative response to a sales question because that’s what usually happens – prepare for a positive response. The tone of your voice will change and that alone may subconsciously direct your prospective customer to agree with you.  

Try it, you might go bananas!

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Do you believe the Weather Forecast?

It was already late autumn (fall) and the Indians on a remote reservation in South Dakota asked their new chief if the coming winter was going to be cold or mild. Since he was a chief in a modern society he had never been taught the old secrets. When he looked at the sky he couldn't tell what the winter was going to be like.

Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he told his tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect firewood to be prepared. But being a practical leader, after several days he got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the
national weather service and asked, "Is the coming winter going to be cold?" It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold," the meteorologist at the weather service responded.

So the chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more firewood in order to be prepared. A week later he called the national weather service again. "Does it still look like it is going to be a very cold winter?" "Yes," the man at national weather service again replied,
"It's going to be a very cold winter."

The chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of firewood they could find.

Two weeks later the chief called the national weather service again. "Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?"
"Absolutely," the man replied. "It’s looking more and more like it is going to be one of the coldest winters we've ever seen."
"How can you be so sure?" the chief asked.
The weatherman replied, "The Indians are collecting firewood like crazy.

The story (apart from being funny) also reflects the way in which we can get ‘carried away in the moment’. If we see an item that we like at an auction house (or bid for an item on eBay) we can easily end up paying more than we wanted because other people also want the item. They want it, we want it. They bid, we bid. They bid again, we bid again and so on, until one of us cracks. If we win, we’re pleased that we now own the item but worried about the cost. If we lose, we’re disappointed. The Indians in the story collected far more wood than they actually needed because of the supposed threat of a very cold winter. At least they won’t have to collect so much wood next winter. If we pay more than we should have for our auction item, at least we’ve got it to use or admire for as long as we want.

What else does this story illustrate? Check your sources? Understand the assumptions that are being made when someone gives you advice? That the weatherman (probably an experienced midlifer) was using his local knowledge to find the best answer?

It’s probably all of these. It also demonstrates how easy it is to believe that something is true because ‘that’s the way it’s done around here’. So when someone tells you that ‘it can’t be done’ or ‘it won’t work here’, try it anyway!

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Please take 1 minute to complete the 2010 Mid Life Survey: Click here

Life Lessons - written by a 90 year old

The list below was written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland, Ohio:
To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most-requested column I've ever written.

My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:
1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone...

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first pay cheque.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come.

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

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