The Best Way to Get Through Life

Many of the roads in The New Forest (where I live) are single track roads, which means that two vehicles have difficulty in passing each other because the road is so narrow. One or both vehicles have to drive partly on the verge to allow enough room to get by each other.

Everybody know this, but it is interesting to see how different people approach the situation. Some people see a car approaching and look around for the best place to pass (which may mean reversing back a little way). Other people just keep driving until they meet the other car, then try to pass in a very difficult spot.

Everybody gets by each other in the end but some people seem to take the difficult way when the simpler way (a wider section of the road) would be so much easier.

We see this in life don’t we? Some people plan ahead and are prepared for what life throws at them. Others live by the day and ‘muddle through’ or rely on the goodwill of others to help them. Some don’t plan at all and seem to be equally successful. We all get by and we all view the world through different eyes so there’s no right and no wrong way, just different ways.

Some people are more arrogant than others; some are more selfish. You are unlikely to change them, so you need to learn to live with them.

We all think that our way is the best way (particularly if we’re religious or into politics). We all need to understand that there are a number of ‘best ways’ and a bit of ‘give and take’ is required to ensure that we all able to pass each other on the single track roads of life.

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The Mid Life Opportunity (www.MidLifeOp.com) is a community for Mid Lifers. Advice and Guidance will soon be available from The Mid Life Coaching Panel. It’s free to join so what are you waiting for?

Please take 1 minute to complete the 2010 Mid Life Survey: Click here

So what is The Mid Life Opportunity?

Yesterday I said that I would explain a little more about the aims of The Mid Life Opportunity. So here goes …

In the UK, there are about 20 million people who would class themselves as ‘middle aged’. As people move through their lives, they are affected in different ways. Success in life brings more choice, a brighter future and the potential of a happy retirement. An unfulfilled life, though, leaves fewer options as we grow older. Finances may be tight, relationships may be under strain or broken, our career may not have peaked at the heights that we hoped for in our younger years. As we grow older, many of us find that spiritualism and religion begins to have more meaning. We may feel the need to emigrate and settle in a new country. Our health may be declining and retirement looms ever nearer – are we prepared for this?

Many people in the middle years of their lives find themselves at a crossroads. 

Big decisions have to be made before it is too late in life to make the changes. For some, the decisions made at this point open up a whole new world of opportunities, greater satisfaction and financial stability. For others, the decisions may not go to plan and a ‘mid life crisis’ develops which can often lead to more wrong decisions and long term decline.

As the decade progresses, many more people will find themselves having to make these crucial decisions, primarily as a result of redundancy, inadequate financial provision or relationship breakdown.

The Mid Life Opportunity (www.MidLifeOp.com) aims to pull together all aspects of ‘mid life’ into one central website and provide stimulation, advice, guidance and support in all these areas. Oh, and a splash of humour to keep everyone amused along the way.

A panel of coaches is being recruited (if you are interested and outside of the UK, you are very welcome to join) to offer the advice and guidance to The Mid Life Opportunity members.

As I said yesterday, we are aiming to go live in August and we will have one of two surprises as part of the launch package – watch this space!

Once again, if you have any questions about me or The Mid Life Opportunity, please ask!

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The Mid Life Opportunity (www.MidLifeOp.com) is a community for Mid Lifers. Advice and Guidance will soon be available from The Mid Life Coaching Panel. It’s free to join so what are you waiting for?

Please take 1 minute to complete the 2010 Mid Life Survey: Click here

Mid Life - a time to shed shells

Adult life has been described as a series of cycles. Throughout these cycles we build life structures that later need to be revised or abandoned. Changes come, and we need a more suitable life pattern. Old structures that no longer serve us can block our personal growth leaving us with a 'smile off' life existence.

My own midlife experience will testify it's not easy for us to shed shells, because the current one is comfortable and known. Inertia can be powerful, but if we refuse to make appropriate changes, we sabotage our own lives. Stagnation and loss of our smile feed on such an attitude. How often have you heard someone say: "This job is soul destroying, but I'm making good money and we're just at the point of being financially comfortable. How can I afford to make a change?" Such questions should make us look more carefully at the life we are leading and lay out some options. Will a small change make a difference? Or is a more radical step needed?

We, as a family, took the radical approach of shell shedding by stopping the world and getting off for a year to live on the quite and peaceful Island of Fuerteventura. What ever you decide, as you shed shells it is normal to go through a period of personal soul searching: thinking about the future and even shutting out the world to some extent.

This soul searching is particularly acute when we face one of life's three 'un's.' The unexpected, the uninvited and the unthinkable: divorce, widowhood, job loss, or serious illness. Dealing with these life 'un's' requires unhurried and quiet time to cope with endings and losses, to sort things out and focus on the future. With the support of others, and our own efforts, a new life pattern gradually emerges bringing with it a new found smile.

Colin writes about how to find your smile, discover your right livelihood and create your ideal life at Midlife Maverick. If you enjoyed this article you may wish to download his acclaimed free e-course, "Live Your Own Life, Only Better!"http://midlifemaverick.com/live-your-own-life-only-better Or, Join his ezine and get "Breaking Free" ebook as a gift.http://www.midlifemaverick.com/breaking-free Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Colin_Hiles For help and advice in Mid Life: http://www.MidLifeOp.com

Big Rocks

"The tutor stood before his class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty glass jar and proceeded to fill it with big rocks. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

So the tutor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the big rocks. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The tutor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous - - yes.

The tutor then produced a can of beer from under the table and proceeded to pour it into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the tutor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognise that this jar represents your life.

The big rocks are the important things - - your family, your partner, your health, your children, your friends, your favourite passions - - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full."

"The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, your car. The sand is everything else - - the small stuff."

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the big rocks. The same goes for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Fall in love. Spend time with your friends. Take your partner out for a meal. There will always be time to go to work, go to the gym, give a dinner party and clean the car.

Take care of the big rocks first - - the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the beer represented. The tutor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a drink!"

What are your 'Big Rocks'? Do you put them in your jar first or do you tip a lot of 'Sand' in at the same time?  Take a few moments to list your 'Big Rocks', 'Pebbles' and 'Sand' and prioritise them in your mind. Then it's time for a celebratory drink!

For help in getting your priorities in order, see: www.betterlifecoaching.co.uk